Oh great guru. I am convinced of your wisdom after reading only a single post. I am trying to make a billion dollars with my new website http://www.the-mayan-calendar.com while at the same time spreading a green message about the mayan calendar like you in your infinite wisdom have done so elegantly. I have already brought attention to your knowing ways at: http://www.the-mayan-calendar.com/mayan-myths.htm
How can I improve this? Being a Guru I know your time is valuable. I am only a student. Please bless me with a touch. And I tried calling you from Guatemala but your line was busy... What gives?
How can I improve this? Being a Guru I know your time is valuable. I am only a student. Please bless me with a touch. And I tried calling you from Guatemala but your line was busy... What gives?
Dear Pilgrim,
I was once like you. Lost on an Endless pursuit for wealth. I worked more than 7 hours a day desperate for the miserable pay my Fat-Cat Bosses paid me, every penny of which was taken by my wife for food, clothes and her extravagant, but necessary, bin bag full of make-up.
I, like many before me, was caught in a trap, believing I could ‘work’ my way to freedom, I wasted my life begging for the next scrap of attention from my superiors.
I, like many before me, was caught in a trap, believing I could ‘work’ my way to freedom, I wasted my life begging for the next scrap of attention from my superiors.
And then I discovered ‘the $ecret to $uccess!’
Now I spend my days in my dream home,
take the Vacations I want to take
and do the things I want to do.
In short I’m living my life the way I want too.
And now, I’m going to teach you how to be as successful as me.
And now, I’m going to teach you how to be as successful as me.
This is not a ‘Get Rich Quick Scheme.’ This is a genuine way to Get Rich Quickly!
But don’t take my word see what these fictional people had to say!
But don’t take my word see what these fictional people had to say!
“Thanks to this scheme I’m now earning so much money a week that I lose more than half of it as Tax! Thank you for helping me to make the country a better place!”
-Mr A Childs (Patriotic Champion)
“I love using exclamation marks but before they were just too expensive!!!! Thanks to your tips I’m can now use ‘multiple’ Exclamation marks without having to get an overdraft first!!!!!!!”
-Tara Blessing!!
“Before this scheme I was just a Gay Man. Now I’m a Gay Man with his own Cruise company!”
-Mr Randy Cruise
In this scheme I’ll teach you
- How to rip off gullible people by creating web pages just like this one.
- How to create sales fever by use Bold and Colour Randomly.
- How to make sites look professional by adding a Bulleted List!
Using these simple techniques you can make money in your sleep!
So why isn’t everyone doing it? Because I won’t let them! Only a limited number of people know these secrets. People just like you. People eager to make millions with absolutely no effort. People capable of finding this website!
Buy my E-book today and start making money straight away.
Normally, this E-book would cost you $799.99. But today I’m letting you have it for
So why isn’t everyone doing it? Because I won’t let them! Only a limited number of people know these secrets. People just like you. People eager to make millions with absolutely no effort. People capable of finding this website!
Buy my E-book today and start making money straight away.
Normally, this E-book would cost you $799.99. But today I’m letting you have it for
$69.95!
There are only
3
of these Fortune Making E-books left!
Don’t miss out on this once in a lifetime opportunity!
Order now and start your new $$$ life Today!
Order now and start your new $$$ life Today!
Marcus
Humor Blogs makes the whole world richer
12 Comments:
You've given away a lot of secrets in this post. It reminds me of the Bruce Lee story. I bet they'll give the next guru part to David Carradine.
What if I want to just be a regular billionaire? Do I still have to shower with you?
MR GB - Only if they can make him look as Handsome as me, which to be honest, would require or the makeup artists in Hollywood,
Dale - Regular Billionaire? What are you, living in the 80's?
I do hope you are wireless. It would be a long way up a pole for you to help the minions get rich.
As far as the internet goes i'm wireless but i found it was impossible to power my laptop on belief alone.
Thank you for bringing your message to the little people. I will Act Now! As Seen on TV! immediately. Oh, and then there's Lose Up To 14 Pounds While You Sleep. But yours is the better offer. It has big letters and color.
P.L. Frederick (SMALL & big)
P.S. Your home is amazing! Architecturally, it's Late Industrial Modern Nouveau Riche, isn't it?
P.L. Frederick (SMALL & big)
sorry to be a bother ol' chap but there is no indication where to send the money ... no worries, my I.O.Us are as good as money. The chance to live on a Pink Floud cover - count me in!
If all it takes is the use of bold words and different colours, then you should have made a small fortune off of this post alone! Canucklhead is right, though, you neglected to tell people where to send their money. How can you scam, er, I mean, help people if you don't tell them where to send their hard-earned cash??
Shit, I'm sure I missed out on a hell of a deal. By now you're clearly all sold out.
Damn. And I just got paid.
Dude,
You´re like blowing me away. This thing with the exclamation points is amazing [exclamation point] I always thought it was cheaper to spell it out than acuatlly use one [exclamation point] It may take some time for me to change my evil ways but I know with your wisdom I am on the right path [exclamation point, exclamation point] Lipe
Out of MYvosi LLC, comes the face of Web 3.0, Maurice Valentino. Valentino never thought that out of his humble past that he would soon be the creator and innovator of the newest web technology that positions him to become the next Internet billionaire.
Myvosi Web 3.0 is a media/data exchange tool, a search engine that gains knowledge of the user the more it is used. It can be used for networking, it offers the most up to date encryption for product being sold/personal information and has a virtual mall with a presence of 250,000 national and international vendors in contract.In addition to your own personal virtual assistant that controls your every experience desire.
"It will challenge us and move us into the future now," says Valentino. The site offers human deductive reasoning and inference. “Imagine a machine with personality that's proactive,sounds like efficiency to me.” states The Face Of Web 3.0(Maurice Valentino).
Valentino also went on to explain in more detail what to expect from MYvosi LLC and Web 3.0."MYvosi Web 3.0 is the successful marriage of artificial intelligence and the web. In addition we want to be efficient not only from an economical and an environmental perspective but also from an individual and technological perspective. Web 1.0 was for all to read, Web 2.0 was for all write and Web 3.0 is and will be for all to innovate.” personalize your future, live out your potential. Myvosi web 3.0 allows you to search by sentences not eliminating the keyword based search but expanding on it. You can type in sentences and in turn, it would return relevant results and suggest other content related to your search terms. You can ask your browser questions such as "where can I go for lunch" and it will provide you, based on your likes & dislikes something suitable (human deductive Reasoning)."Many fear that this detailed information about them will be exposed, but it is the exact opposite," says Valentino. Your likes and dislike /personal information are not publicized they are on an encrypted network using the same encryption's as the one used by the major banks in the world(ex. the TLS and the high 128 bit SSL encryption). This graduates the common concept of the current web, typing in the same information and getting the same information. What's now offered is a unique individual experience on the web tailored to fit you personality. Myvosi Web 3.0 consist partially of "mashup" applications. An example would be looking up restaurants and have it tie in to another application(GPS) giving you place and directions. Myvosi Web 3.0 has the most intelligent software agent at the click of a button. You can share data files securely and efficiently without the threat of viral and other harmful applications (worms,Trojan horses,malware,etc) infecting your computer.A quote from Thomas Chille" For manifesting a web 3.0, we need a web 3.0. We need a real evolutionary shift in the perception of the web by the end users. Much like the paradigm shift in involving the user generated content for web 2.0." Its purpose is to educate, create, and innovate the end User's experience of the Web's resources. It is an Advanced Version Of the 3 dimensional giant"Second Life,"but Extremely user efficient. The applauding moment was simply this stated by The Face Of Web 3.0 "Most importantly Web 3.0 Is all of you. It isn't the dominating player with the most Bank. It is about you (the user). We as individuals craft web 3.0. we all have a major role in its implementation" says Valentino. This is just an overview of what Myvosi Web 3.0 offers. The detailed version would require a 1,000 paged text book and far superceeds what was said today. Myvosi Web 3.0 launch date is in the summer (July) of 2010.
Special Acknowledgments:
*Barack Obama in his spirited aura of change
*Tim Berners-Lee and Robert Cailliau who created the World Wide Web at CERN
*James Hendler An artificial Intelligence Researcher
*Nigel Richard Shadbolt founder of the Web Science Research Initiative
*Ora Lassila a Finnish computer scientist
*Computer Science University of Southampton
*Artificial intelligence department @ University of Edinburgh
*Eric Schmidt CEO Of Google
*Doug Lenat Computer Scientist Ceo of Cycorp
*Kevin Kelly Great Mind
If I left anyone out you are not forgotten, but for the sake of time, many more I give thanks to. Thank you all for your research , your time invested in making us better and more efficient economically and environmentally, America and the World thanks you.
A few pioneers of Green Energy who deserve recognition
*Scott mcnealy co founder of sun micro systems say that technology of the Internet is the most planetary efficient way of conducting business
*John Doer partner, Kleiner Perkins Caufield Byers
says that Germany is the largest buyer of solar cells around the world
"These are point that should be noticed and implemented in our economic and environmental strategy and conducive to like such recovery" Says Valentino
*MIT chemist Daniel Nocera
*Thomas Hinderling innovator who wants to build solar island to make us more efficient.
*Texas oilmen like T. Boone Pickens started pushing alternative energy
*Steven Chu head the Department of Energy
just to name a few.
"These are a few of the people who have inspired me to offer the Next generation ready platform. I look at their stories and their desire to innovate and to make better. These are things and mindsets I was conceived in. These Great minds gave me the foundation to start myvosi and change the future. So I personally feel they deserve a great deal of recognition" Says The Face Of Web 3.0 Maurice Valentino
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